wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
