i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
