when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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