Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
We just shotgunned beers for America
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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