Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Randomize
