I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize