Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
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We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
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If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
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