I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
