Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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