1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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