IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Randomize
