I wannas sexs uuuuu
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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