you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
