Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
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