Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
