There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Randomize
