Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
