yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
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