babies were throwing up all over the place
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize