for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Randomize
