So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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