3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize