My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Randomize
