why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
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