I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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