People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize
