no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize
