Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
