i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
you didnt know i had herpes?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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