i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize