but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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