Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
