How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
