i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
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