i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
