All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
