I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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