that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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