You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
My penis needs a shock collar
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
