I like my sex mixed with concussions.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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