Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
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