So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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