i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
