you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
