Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
