The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
