She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
