I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
it's great music for shaving your balls
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
