I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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