dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
